Sexy Self-Care

I attended a panel at this year’s Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit called Keep Giving a Fuck: A Conversation about Prioritizing Sex During Trying Times that inspired me to start a list of sexy self-care ideas for when I’m feeling down.

The panel, led by JoEllen Notte and Indira Dutt, focused on how a lot of people feel like sex can’t (or shouldn’t) take priority over dealing with problems we’re experiencing in our lives. Whether you’re living with mental or physical health issues, economically stressed, or, perhaps one of many marginalized folks struggling with the current political mess, maybe sex and pleasure has found its way to the back burner.

While it’s absolutely fine to not want to make sex a priority, many of us struggle to reclaim or retain at least some aspects of sexiness and pleasure. Here are a few ways I like to stay in touch with my sexuality when I’m feeling overwhelmed by everything else!


Listening to my favorite sex-related podcasts

Even if I don’t have the spoons to be physically sexual, I sure can think about it! I love listening to podcasts to get me thinking about sexy topics that interest me, or encourage contemplation about my fantasies and kinks.

Some of my favorite podcasts are The Dildorks, Sex Gets Real, Why are People into That?, Sex Out Loud, and Take Back Your Sex.


Appeasing my inner sex geek with a good book

Similarly, I enjoying reading a good book to stimulate my brain! Re-reading Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski is always great. Every time I revisit the book I stumble upon a new epiphany or new subject to ponder. A couple others I’ve enjoyed are The Feminist Porn Book and Coming Out like a Porn Star.

I’ve got O: The Intimate History of the Orgasm, Future Sex, and Vibrator Nation on my reading list.


Taking a bath

This is kind of a staple on most people’s self-care lists, and for good reason. And it’s especially applicable in this context. Relaxing in a warm bath is a good way to pamper yourself, experience pleasant sensations, and take some time out of your day to focus solely on yourself (especially important for us introverts!). For me, having time alone in the bath usually means having an opportunity to enjoy some of my favorite waterproof sex toys. And preferably with bubbles.


Coloring books

I’m fully on the adult coloring book bandwagon and it’s become one of my go-to activities when I need to relax and do something calming. SheVibe has some amazing NSFW books that are perfect for when I want to add something fun and sexy to the mix. I colored some pages at Woodhull, and recently got a copy of their newest book,  Fantasmic. My nerdy self has been enjoying Fantasmic quite a bit. There are fairies, vampires, and dragons, oh my!

THANK YOU SheVibe for sending me this coloring book!



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