Sqweel Go

Is it a carnival ride for ants? Not quite. Is it part of a sex toy paddle boat? Still no. A vibrator? Not exactly. It’s an oral sex simulator.

The Sqweel Go1, made by the folks at Lovehoney, is a really cool toy. It is mainly meant to be used on the vulva/clitoris, but of course you can use it anywhere you want to be licked. sqweelgo3I can only think of one other toy, the LELO Ora, that is meant to simulate oral sex2 but it has an entirely different design from the Sqweel Go. A bigger version of it has been around for a few years but now they’ve made a smaller, travel-friendly one. I imagine the Go is easier to use since it is more compact and fits in your hand so well.

As I already mentioned, this isn’t a vibrator. Instead of vibrating, it features a wheel of tiny silicone “tongues” that spins at different speeds and in different patterns. I’ve pointed out in a few reviews already that vibration patterns aren’t really my thing, but I really dig the patterns of the Sqweel Go. So much so that I might even say I prefer them to the steady speeds. Lovehoney describes the three patterns as “light shudders, intense pulsations, and fast licks.” The single button on the front of the toy is used to turn it on and cycle through the three speeds and then the three patterns. It does not have a memory function, meaning that when you turn it on it always starts from the lowest speed setting instead of on the setting you were using when you turned it off last.

One thing that really excites me about the Sqweel Go is that it is USB rechargeable. Rechargeable toys are my favorite and I fucking love it when they can be charged via USB. I don’t know about y’all, but I have a ton of shit plugged into my outlets and power strips constantly. It’s nearly always a struggle for me to find a spot where I can plug my toys in to charge (especially when they’re huge chargers…) but I always have USB ports open. Anyway, the cord plugs into the bottom of the toy and if the blue light comes on that means it is charging, and when the light goes off that means it’s fully charged.sqweelgo2

Another exciting thing about the Sqweel Go is that it is fully waterproof. This gives you the option to use it in the bath or shower and it makes cleaning it super easy. And in case you’re wondering, yes, it does paddle itself around in water just like you hoped it would. I couldn’t not try that.

Despite all of the things that make it appealing to me, the appeal only exists in theory and sadly not in practice. I tried using the Sqweel Go many different ways, on different occasions, and it could never quite do it for me. I found that it’s not a good ‘warm-up’ toy; if I’m not physically aroused yet, it just feels kind of boring. But on the flip side, if I’m very aroused it doesn’t feel good either. If it’s directly stimulating my clit it’s uncomfortable because it’s way too sensitive for the kind of sensation the Sqweel Go provides. I usually prefer stimulation more on the side, but when I do it that way it doesn’t provide enough stimulation. I also tried using it both with the tongues going down and up, and it didn’t make too much of a difference to me which direction they went. It might be nice to use a vibrator with it but I already need two hands to use this thing (one to hold it and one to help it actually stimulate my clit) and seeing as I don’t have a third to hold a vibrator too, I guess I’ll never know if that would work.

sqweelgo4Aside from using it on my vulva, I tried it a couple more places. On my nipples it felt okay, but again it’s not really the kind of stimulation I prefer. But I could certainly see how other people could find it more pleasurable. I tried using it on my ass, too, and that I liked a little more but still not enough that I would regularly use it that way. It could provide a good alternative to rimming if you and/or your partner aren’t comfortable with an actual tongue licking your ass.

No matter where I used it, I found that it was best to use a lot (I mean A LOT) of lube. This is kind of a pain because I want it on all of the “tongues” and there are ten of them.

While most of my disappointment with the Sqweel Go has to do with my own anatomy, there’s something about the toy itself that I am unhappy about: it’s hella noisy. The motor that makes the wheel ‘o tongues spin around makes a high-pitched sound, getting louder the faster it spins. It reminds me of the dentist. So that’s definitely distracting and unpleasant.

Although I applaud Lovehoney’s innovation when it comes to the Sqweel Go, it’s just not something my body enjoys. It doesn’t provide the right kind of stimulation for me but I feel like it could work for other people who enjoy this kind of stimulation more. In other words, it seems like it’s just a preference thing and not really anything about the toy (except the noise issue). I have a really hard time reaching orgasm through actual oral sex, so I guess I shouldn’t be incredibly surprised that the Sqweel Go can’t make me come. But at least the real thing feels really good regardless of orgasms happening or not. Unfortunately, the Sqweel Go doesn’t.

Wanna try it? You can get your very own Sqweel Go from Lovehoney!

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THANK YOU Lovehoney for sending me this toy in exchange for my honest review!

  1. Or the “Lickitung” as Liam likes to call it []
  2. Cunnilingus, not fellatio. Of course the latter has been around in myriad forms for a long time. []